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Deadpool/Quotes

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Quotes

General

  • [Defeating boss] "Also, your action figure sucks!"
  • [Defeating boss] "Don't get up, I'll let myself out."
  • [Defeating boss] "I better level up for this."
  • [Defeating boss] "I'm a panda. Look me up!"
  • [Defeating boss] (bad French accent) "My cuisine rrings supreme!"
  • [Defeating boss] "Seriously, who writes this stuff?"
  • [Defeating boss] "So the duck says: got any grapes?"
  • [Defeating boss] "This defeat brought to you by the latter, Deadpool."
  • [Defeating boss] "To get to the other side! Hahah, right."
  • [Defeating boss] "You'll be back in a sequel!"
  • [Defeating boss] "You never get tired from being a loser? Because I don't."
  • [Finding item] "It's dangerous to go alone. I'll take this!"
  • [Finding item] (groan) "You don't wanna know where I keeping this!"
  • [Inventory full] (chuckling) "Sorry, my underpants already full."
  • [Inventory full] "Yeah, I want to, but I just can't hold anymore."
  • [Learning new powers] "All that work and all I get is a lousy new power!"
  • [Learning new powers] "It's great to learn 'cause knowledge is power!"
  • [Learning new powers] "Who needs book learning when you have that!"
  • [Level up] "Another minor statistical upgrade."
  • [Level up] "Hold on, hold on, gotta do some math now."
  • [Level up] (chuckling) "I honestly didn't expect you to play this long. Seriously, you need a life."
  • [Level up] "Now am I the best there is at what I do?"
  • [Level up] "Oh-ho-ho, min me to max, baby!"
  • [Level up] "This is some stat geek-thing, right?"
  • [Level up] "Wo-ho-hoo, plus five charisma!"
  • [Out of spirit] "Coffee, please!"
  • [Out of spirit] "I don't wanna..."
  • [Out of spirit] "I require more Vespen gas."
  • [Out of spirit] "Okay, time for a nap!"
  • [When summoned] "Does this mean my movie's getting a greenlight?"
  • [When summoned] "Hold on! Forgot my theme music."
  • [When summoned] "You know I'm both massive and multiplayer."

Story

  • [Defeating Magneto] "Now you trusting me to bring back prisoner safely? And they call ME crazy!"
  • [Encountering Bullseye] "Wanna use me as a dartboard?"
  • [Defeating Bullseye] "That's what you get for having a target on your head."
  • [Encountering Green Goblin] "I'm telling you, the guy make me looking like a model of mental health."
  • [Encountering Mandarin] "Nice rings, you must have wiped a Shire full of hobbits!"
  • [Encountering Shanna the She-Devil] "Me Deadpool, you Jane."
  • [Ending Smash HYDRA!] "See kids, this is why you pay attention to the foreshadowing."
  • [Ending Stryker Under Siege] "For those of you who skipped it we are going to Disneyland to fight Mister Sillystaff! What, close enough!"
  • [Ending Tablet of Life and Time] "And now I bet I'm supposed to chase that guy!"
  • [Ending The Tablet Chase] "Wait, wait, wait, where did the lawyer go? I wanted to get her number."
  • [Entering A.I.M. Weapon Facility] "Hey, is this the right place to complain about my new smartphone?"
  • [Entering Base Sewers] "Nice decor! Reminds me of my apartment."
  • [Entering Castle Doom] "What a coincidence, I was this close to buying this place myself."
  • [Entering Doomstadt Outer Village] "This place is even creepier than a Sesame Street! What can I say, puppets creep me out."
  • [Entering Kingpin's Collection] "Do we really trust me to handle this tablet responsibly? I don't think so."
  • [Entering Landing Pad] "Hey look, just got a mission. Now my life is complete."
  • [Entering Ruined Projects] "Whew, I'd cut off my nose if it wouldn't grow back!"
  • [Entering Sinister Lab] "Before we trash all of this stuff mind if I clone myself a few times first?"
  • [Entering Taskmaster Insitute] "The Taskmaster? That guy owes me twenty bucks."
  • [Entering Upper East Side] "I'm glad I never had to fight MY costumes."
  • [Starting Infestation Most Vile] "Ah, I'm not sure these special effects are believable enough for me."
  • [Starting Purification Crusade] "Wow, I can't believe you guys get Jean-Luc Picard to be in your game."
  • [Starting Smash HYDRA!] "Suure, like who else would be crazy enough to sign up for a mission like this?"
  • [Starting Stryker Under Siege] "Did you see size of the dude's head? Wa-ha-ha!"
  • [Starting The Kingpin Falls] "Is talking over yet? Cause I see we have another mission here."

Character Specific

  • [To Black Panther Black Panther] "Oh yeah? Well I'm king of Deadpoolvania."
  • [To Black Widow Black Widow] (insinuatingly) "Come on, just say it once: "Moose and Squirrel"."
  • [To Cable Cable] "Cable? Hoo, no thanks, I have Satellite."
  • [To Captain America Captain America] "You're as American as Mom's apple pies and handguns!"
  • [To Colossus Colossus] "I gotta say Pete, Domino's made ya a lot more fun to be around"
  • [To Colossus Colossus] "Is there a line for the Fastball Special, or can I use FastPass?"
  • [To Colossus Colossus] "So you're entirely metal, huh? That ever get, err... you know, awkward?"
  • [To Cyclops Cyclops] "Hey, look everybody I'm BICLOPS! (snicker)"
  • [To Daredevil Daredevil] "Hey! Watch where you're gooh my bad."
  • [To Deadpool Deadpool] "He-hey, Deadpool team-up!"
  • [To Deadpool Deadpool] "Mama always liked you best."
  • [To Deadpool Deadpool] "Oh, oh, which one of us has the goatee?"
  • [To Deadpool Deadpool] "Ugh, I hate clones! No, wait, that's Spider-man. Hey, how you doing?"
  • [To Deadpool Deadpool] "Oooo! I played you in Marvel vs. Capcom... You sucked!"
  • [To Doctor Doom Doctor Doom] "Which college offers a doctorate in Doom sizes?"
  • [To Doctor Doom Doctor Doom] "Hey Vic, are you even a Doctor? Didn't they kick you out for blowin' up their lab?"
  • [To Doctor Strange Doctor Strange] "What, no top hat? What kind of magician are you? "
  • [To Emma Frost Emma Frost] "What's your (super)power again? Is it dressing impractically?"
  • [To Gambit Gambit] "You know, maybe I need an accent too. ''Ello, mon ami"."
  • [To Ghost Rider Ghost Rider] "Oh man, and I forgot to bring the marshmallows."
  • [To Hawkeye Hawkeye] "Oh, oh, so they let the Robin Hood in, but somehow the Avengers keep losing my phone number. S'up with that?"
  • [To Hulk Hulk] "So, I just spent some time with Red Hulk, and I can personally say, you're much more fun than he is."
  • [To Hulk Hulk] "Soo, Greenie, can I get your cousin's phone number?"
  • [To Human Torch Human Torch] "You know I could "flame on", if I just had some lighter fluid."
  • [To Iron Man Iron Man] "Iron Man, Iron Man, does whatever an iron can, (chuckles)"
  • [To Iron Man Iron Man] "I'd sing some Black Sabbath but the bean counter says we spent all our money on writers. What a waste."
  • [To Jean Grey Jean Grey] "Hey, aren't you dead? Or was that the last issue?"
  • [To Juggernaut Juggernaut] "You know if you were called the Huggernaut, I bet people would like you a lot more."
  • [To Kitty Pryde Kitty Pryde] "Heeeey Kitty Kitty Kitty, ya ever played Street Fighter?"
  • [To Luke Cage Luke Cage] "Bro, what is it? Solid! (beat) Too urban? I'm very sorry."
  • [To Ms. Marvel Ms. Marvel] "Careful, Marvel Comics will sue you for trademark infringement."
  • [To Punisher Punisher] "You're just me without the funny, and the lithium."
  • [To Scarlet Witch Scarlet Witch] "More like the Scarlet Bii... he-hey, didn't see you there!"
  • [To Spider-Man Spider-Man] (slyly) "Hey, buddy, mind if I ask Mary Jane out on a date?"
  • [To Spider-Man Spider-Man] "Hey, Spider-face, that aunt of yours single? Just curious!"
  • [To Spider-Man Spider-Man] "Hey, Webby... How's it hanging!?"
  • [To Spider-Man Spider-Man] "With great power comes great merchandising opportunities!"
  • [To Storm Storm] "I heard once you go Black Panther you never go back!"
  • [To Thing Thing] "No way, your eyes really are blue!"
  • [To Thor Thor] "Is that Mjolnir in your hand or you just happy to see me? Heh-heh, OK, so it's a hammer."
  • [To Thor Thor] (singing) "Thunderbolts and lightning, very-very frightening, Thor!"
  • [To Venom Venom] "You look like something I horcked up last time I had swine flu. (hocks) All right, look at that. Crap I got a little venom on you."
  • [To Vision Vision] "Hey, do you think that solar gem could heat up my microwave burrito without making it soggy?"
  • [To War Machine War Machine] "What happened Iron Man, did you run out of paint or something?"
  • [To Wolverine Wolverine] "Hey, Wolvie, any chance I can provoke you into some pointless bloodshed?"

Battle

  • "23, skidoo!"
  • (pitched) "Again again!"
  • "Aand, BOOM goes the dynamite!"
  • "Can I have my bullets back now?"
  • (crazy laughter)
  • "Does this mean we can't be friends?"
  • "Do I get a badge for this?"
  • (Curly Howard noises)
  • "Durp, durp."
  • "Eeh, that supposed to bend like that?"
  • "Explosions attract the coveted 18 to 24 year old male demographic."
  • "For the win!"
  • "Heh, it'll grow back."
  • "Hello! This thing on?"
  • [Fighting HYDRA] "Hey, do you know my friend, Bob?"
  • "Hey, I'm all out of jokes! No, I'm not."
  • "I beat a minion!"
  • "I could do that all day."
  • "I could use a few more lines you know!"
  • "I leveled up yet?"
  • "I'll be back to pick you up later!"
  • "In the face!"
  • "My fight! My fight!!"
  • "Natural twenty!"
  • "No XP? What a ripoff!"
  • "Okay, now you have time to hear my new jokes!"
  • (pitched) "Okay, you can all go to the prom with me."
  • "Ooh, bouncy!"
  • "Oops! One of us broke something."
  • (psycho laughter)
  • "Quick! Loot the body!"
  • "Same time next Tuesday?"
  • "Shoryuken!"
  • "So, three mutants walk into a bar, right..."
  • "Stop me if you heard this one before."
  • "Thanks for playing!"
  • "That's for unfriending me."
  • "Wait-wait-wait, how much XP you worth again?"
  • (bad French accent) "You want blend or puree?"
  • Duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh hurty, duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh fighty, hurty, fighty, hurty, fighty, slicey, slicey, facey, kickey

Property Damage

  • (squeaking) "Did I do that?"
  • "I doubt that will be good for property value."
  • "I may have a TINY issue with respecting people's property."
  • "Is that an antique?"
  • "Sorry! Hope nobody needed that!"
  • "Was that really necessary?"

Waiting

  • "Ahh, just a bunch of pixels, nothing to see here."
  • "Hey, where's my lambada dance emote?"
  • "What could possibly be more important than clicking on stuff down here?"
  • (pitched) "Yoohooo, down heeere!"

Lady Deadpool Quotes

Character Specific

  • [To Deadpool Deadpool] "Please stop cosplaying me!"
  • [To Storm Storm] "I brought an umbrella just for this occasion."

Pirate Deadpool Quotes

General

  • [Defeating a boss] "How does it feel to have your butt kicked by a wooden leg?

Character Specific

  • [To Thor Thor] "What be a pirate's favorite fancy place? AsgARRRd."

Heroes Roster

Angela/Quotes Ant-Man/Quotes Beast/Quotes Black Bolt/Quotes Black Cat/Quotes Black Panther/Quotes Black Widow/Quotes Blade/Quotes Cable/Quotes Captain America/Quotes Captain Marvel/Quotes Colossus/Quotes Cyclops/Quotes Daredevil/Quotes Deadpool/Quotes Dr. Doom/Quotes Doctor Strange/Quotes Elektra/Quotes Emma Frost/Quotes Gambit/Quotes Ghost Rider/Quotes Green Goblin/Quotes Hawkeye/Quotes Hulk/Quotes

Human Torch/Quotes Iceman/Quotes Invisible Woman/Quotes Iron Fist/Quotes Iron Man/Quotes Jean Grey/Quotes Juggernaut/Quotes Kitty Pryde/Quotes Loki/Quotes Luke Cage/Quotes Magik/Quotes Magneto/Quotes Moon Knight/Quotes Mr. Fantastic/Quotes Nick Fury/Quotes Nightcrawler/Quotes Nova/Quotes Psylocke/Quotes Punisher/Quotes Rocket Raccoon/Quotes Rogue/Quotes Scarlet Witch/Quotes She-Hulk/Quotes Silver Surfer/Quotes

Spider-Man/Quotes Squirrel Girl/Quotes Star-Lord/Quotes Storm/Quotes Taskmaster/Quotes Thing/Quotes Thor/Quotes Ultron/Quotes Venom/Quotes Vision/Quotes War Machine/Quotes Winter Soldier/Quotes Wolverine/Quotes X-23/Quotes

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